bragging rights February 26, 2007

I need to just take a moment to brag about my amazing husband. Indulge me. Yesterday, our long awaited nursery furniture was available for pick up at our local baby superstore (these superstores are crazy!). So we rented a uhaul cargo van and went to pick up our crib, dresser and hutch. You would not believe how excited I have been about getting this furniture. It just makes having a baby so much more real (not that the kicking in my belly isn’t reality enough).

We had been told that putting nursery furniture together can be pretty tricky. But no- not for Corey. He busted out the parts and whipped the crib together in 20 minutes! It was so funny to hear him talk- I was in the other room blocked by very LARGE cardboard boxes checking out our new carseat. We think he should have been an engineer. Very different from photographer- but only God knows why things happen the way they do.

We also got our stoller and carseat from church as a gift- very cool. Another amazing stunt by Corey. In 10 minutes without looking at any manual (okay I think he looked once at the end to make sure he did something right), he had that stroller put together and working like magic.

My husband is a genius. Thanks for letting me brag. Now if only he could clean up the cardboard box mess as fast as he put the parts together More adventures in preparing for parenting coming soon.

birthing classes February 20, 2007

Last night Corey and I went to our first of six birthing classes at the hospital.  It was pretty fun!  Okay, so we were clearly the youngest couple, I was the farthest along in my pregnancy (which means that everyone else planned ahead to take the class), and interestingly enough we are also the only couple of about nine who want to have a natural birth.  Talk about the odd ones out!  I felt bad for some of the men because the first thing the instructor did was pull out two very large diagrams of the female anatomy (pre-pregnancy, and pregnant).

For some I’m sure it was a crash course in what’s actually going on in a woman’s body when she prepares to have a baby.  Hopefully it instills more sympathy in the male gender :)- not that Corey isn’t sympathetic enough…

The instructor had asked us part of the way through the class to remember a time we were in pain, and how we responded to that pain.  She said we would respond similarly to the pain of childbirth- which was a horrid thought for me because I am a whiner, I get anxious, and I freak out when I’m in pain.  I was laughing outwardly, and but my insides are saying I have a lot of work to do if I think I can handle the pain of childbirth.

We learned the importance of Rhthym, Relaxation, and Ritual in childbirth- which I think are just as applicable to all parts of life.  Rhthym- finding a rhthym in life that helps us to set a pace which is manageable, a pace that allows us to enjoy life and people, and rhthym that is steady.  Relaxation- learning to trust in God, and give Him all things so that I can relax and not be anxious about anything (as the bible commands).  Ritual- do what I do consistently, faithfully, and well.  I would also add to ritual to find the things in life that bring the most joy and be faithful in those things (which at the top of my list right now is to have good Bible Reading Ritual- i’m working on it…anther is to blog/verbalize/write regularly)

We ended the night with some great  breathing techniques, which I think should be practiced at all times, not just during pregnancy, but I realized just how tense of a person I really am.   All this to say, as my time at Quest comes to a close next Wednesday, my list of things to prepare for our baby grows long.  And at the top of that list is taking a refresher course in how to relax, breath deeply, and enjoy feeling good while I have the chance.

I still want to have my baby naturally by the way- I better get started on rhthym, relaxing and rituals.

mondays February 5, 2007

I wish I had something great to write about today.  Mondays are always gloomy for me.  I’m not sure what exactly it is.  I always have a wonderful- though exhausting- Sunday at church…it’s my favorite day of the week usually…why does Monday have to be so crummy?  If I were in the t-shirt making business I would make a t-shirt about how grumpy I am on Mondays.  This morning I drove to work in a thick fog.  When I left in the afternoon, the fog had only lifted maybe a few hundred feet.  I hadn’t seen fog like that in a while. 

There are two things I am thankful for today though.  The first is that our church got good news that our neighboring church will be merging with us, which means not only do we have a little more space to grow into (we’re practically bulging at the seams, and not just numerically), but we have a newly adopted family!  I am most excited when I think about worshipping with the “older generation”.  I have missed that for many many years.  I miss people pinching my cheeks, telling me stories of the old days, and imparting their wisdom-that-only-comes-with-gray-hair.  I mean that in the nicest way possible.

The second thing I am thankful for is the wriggling baby in my belly.  Oh my goodness this child does not stop moving!  At my next doctors appointment I am going to ask the doctor if it’s possible for a baby to move too much in the womb.  I’ve been told an active baby in utero is an active baby out.  I’m just praying he/she doesn’t wriggle this much on their way out.  But seriously- There is not an hour in the day when this child is not kicking, or spinning, or shifting.  Corey and I are getting more and more curious- will the baby have dark skin? dark hair? light eyes?  be a light-weight or a butterball?  girl or boy (we’re still on the fence about this one)?  so many questions and only8 weeks to wait.  We could place bets on this next statement, but I feel like the next 8 weeks are going to fly by.  I’m sure my mom is laughing at that one.  And by the way, our baby has a nickname: rootbeer.  I have rediscovered my love of rootbeer and can’t get enough of it now that I know it’s caffeine free.  Big trouble and a serious sugar high.

Thank you God for this day…even though I grumbled my way through it.  Thank you for your faithfulness to Quest and Interbay.  Thank you for my wonderful growing family and this wriggling little fish in my belly.  And thank you for rootbeer.

why? February 1, 2007

why is it that the people you love most hurt you the most?  why is it that the people you love most you hurt the most?  why is it that the people you have the most to say to, are the hardest to speak to?  why is it that people don’t listen to you, why is it that when your listening it’s so hard to hear?  why is it that people push things under the rug, why is it that people want to crawl under the rug and hide away just like the stuff they’re trying to avoid?  why is it just when you think you understand, you’re so confused?  And just when you think things can’t get more complicated- they do?  why is it so easy to judge others, and so hard to look at your own faults?  why is it that we dream when we can’t seem to reach our dreams?  why is it that just when everything seems perfect, something so imperfect rears it’s ugly head?  why is it that just when someone thinks they have all the answers a thousand questions float through their mind?  why is it that just when someone gets their confidence back, doubt clouds their senses? 

why not? 

sometimes i am amazed at the brokenness i see around me, and in me.  how fragile is our ego, our heart, our ability to see beyond today…how quickly we close our ears to hearing the things that are good for us, and how quick we open our ears to lies, deceit, and discouraging thoughts and ideas.  oh how difficult these things make the basic skill of communicating with people!  just when i want a glimmer of hope, i shut my eyes in stubborness and selfishness.  all thoughts of treating others with kindness, gentleness, peace, patience, and goodness are tossed out the window! 

it’s in these broken moments- i feel like i’m on my face, a humble position to be in, but really, i’m trying to pull myself up, desparately dragging myself, trying to do it “all by myself”.  oh God- when will it stop?  when i am hurting help me to forgive, and when I hurt others grant me your gracious heart of forgiveness.

may this baby inside me- who by the way has been kicking like crazy ALL day- see past my brokenness as their mother, but see into my heart, the place you dwell even though at times i hide it.  and my your dwelling place grow so big in my heart that your light oozes out of my pores, that your words pour from my mouth, that my eyes reflect your beauty, and that my ears listen to your gentle whisper and teach my child how to hear you too.